Advice for Day 12: Shedding the Unemployed [Undisclosed Amount] Weight

Four years ago, there was the freshman 15 (or closer to 40 in my fried-food-loving case). Now there is the Unemployed-I’m-too-old-too-admit-my-weight weight gain.

The inevitable weight gain makes sense. There are similar conditions of unemployment and the first year of college: sinking self-esteem, mass consumption of comfort food and mindless hours of reality TV marathons, all a recipe for an extra little layer of fat.

Two months into my unemployment journey, I suddenly realized I have a child-size inner tube inflating around my waist. More than just being a result of my LOST and Mac&Cheese binges, my extra few pounds signal my digression to a defeatist lifestyle. I have given my life over to cheese and Chinese food.

But all hope is not lost [nor weight gained]. Here are my new Unemployment [Undisclosed] Weight Gain Resolutions:

1. Food is not an event to anticipate. Your morning should not be consumed by whether you are going to have Mexican or Thai for lunch. Your dinner selection should never be a topic of discussion at lunch. There are other events- like yoga, book readings, workshops, volunteer events, or trips to the coffee shop- that actually make up a life worth living.

2. Addiction to food is just as powerful as addiction to crack, or at least it seems like it. Once you put sugar and red meat into your body, your body will want more of it. Taking away the crackalicous unhealthy food will be painful for a week or two but after, your body will adjust and, like a crack baby reborn, you will be addiction free.

3. Jogging is way cheaper than anti-depressants, especially for the uninsured. A slight depression seems to come with the jobless territory but jogging gives you your fill of free endorphins plus a good hour not taken up with worry.

I want to be clear with myself: this is not a diet. Mainly this is not a diet because diets never work and I refuse to ever utter the phrases: low-carb, fat-free, or Jenny Craig. No this is not a diet; it is me regaining control of the bulging belly and hopefully my life.